Hidden
By: Jalene Stringfellow
My parents are some of the most important people in my life. They divorced when I was only 6 months old. I didn’t know what was going on, but as I grew up over the years I realized that sometimes having divorced parents is not so easy. I hear people talk about how they wished their parents would get a divorce, but as I have experienced that is not always the best thing. Sometimes I was glad that they separated because they were not together and would still argue with each other. Other times I wished there was some way I could bring them back together and have them love one another like they once did before, and at times I wish I could be put up for adoption. I always wanted to know why they separated, but every time I asked I never got a straight answer to why. I went back and fourth between my mom and dad. On some days I wanted to live with my dad and on other days I wanted to live with my mom. My dad received full custody of me when I was little. I saw my mom every other weekend. When I was young it did not have that much of an impact on me because I didn’t fully understand what happened. As I grew up and started to reach my young teenage years and middle teenage years I realized that this was the time I needed both of my parents more then ever. I prayed and prayed almost every night that one day they would get back together and we would be a happy family again. But were we ever a happy family at one point in life? What made my family separate? I wanted to know if my brother and I were the reason our parents decided it was time to separate and move on with their lives. As I look back in my child hood and my teenage years, I think about how my parents divorce has made me who I am today and made me as strong as I am. If I would have never went through the obstacles I would not be a strong willed person. Hitting rock bottom many times through my life has impacted me in both awful and superior ways. I realized that sometimes life takes you on a different road then what you want. You could be heading towards one direction and in seconds you could be heading towards another. I had to pick up the pieces when I would hit bottom and move on in my life. My dad had custody of me until the end of my 8 grade year in school and then I moved to Bailey to live with my mom. I lived with her until half way through my 10 grade year in high school and then I went to live back with my dad. Two months into my junior year I moved back with my mom. I went back and fourth between both of my parents. I always felt guilty when I moved to live with my opposite parent. I felt like I always had to pick between my mom and dad. It was a challenge because I knew every time I picked someone would get hurt. It tore me apart, but those are the challenges I went through that made me a tough person. I can say that it does anger me and hurt me inside to have my parents separated. I try not to let the pain show or let it effect me, but when I think about it and wrote about it, all the emotions on how I really feel started to come out. I took the time to sit down with a counselor to talk about teens and how a divorce can impact them. I learned that the hardest thing for teens that have gone through a divorce or are going through one, their self esteem is the biggest concern and give away that something is going on. Teens can lose their self esteem and become depressed in situations like a divorce. Keep your heads up high and try to look into the future and not so much in your past. At times it can become hard, but just remember your friends and family are there for you and will help you in anyway they can.
